1. Some people lose their minds, and, never mind what they lose.
2. When we are young, we must mind our parents; when we are grown, we must mind our business.
3. Some folks are so blooming busy, they don't take time to smell the roses.
4. It takes some of us women longer to make up our minds, than to make up our faces.
5. Some people don't know "beans" about coffee!
6. To some, the subject of coffee is a real grind.
7. (Husband:) If you had a brain, it would be out to lunch!
(Wife:) I can't say the same for you; you're starving your brain to death!
8. (Wife:) I've lost 20 pounds in one month!
(Husband:) And, you found them all in one week.
9. In the old West, if you were a gun slinger, you might wind up a rope swinger.
10. Some husbands take out the garbage more than they take out their wives.
11. Some folks want to boot up their computers; some just want to boot them out.
12. If you always smell trouble, perhaps your nose is in someone else's business.
13. Children usually find it easier to mind other people's business, than to mind their own parents.
14. If only changing your man were as easy as changing your mind...
15. Change your baby boy while you still can;
you can't change him, once he's a man.
16. Divorce is like Algebra; you can't find the value of X.
17. Changing your mind is like changing your clothes, only cheaper.
18. Old stand-up comedians never die; they just swich to sitcoms.
19. Those who really believe God is dead should open His Word, and read His will.
20. Stand-up comedians never take laughter sitting down.
Copyright 2003 by Quipster
All Rights Reserved.